Thankful Thursday

I am thankful the garbage men are able to decorate the neighborhood with the garbage that just happens not to make it into the truck. It’s interesting because it all started in bags in the garbage cans.

I am thankful for the naked Barbies in the shower. Now I have a constant reminder of what I don’t look like. Talk about tough standards, Barbie is how old and her boobs still look like that (she’s so lucky).

I am thankful for the old phones that the kids have scattered all over the house.  As id Teddy didn’t talk enough on his cell phones (our old ones); he’s very popular with his invisible friends. The kids thought they didn’t work because there were no batteries in them. So I plugged one in and had Stella rotary dial my phone number. She then said, “You had to do that every time?”

I am thankful that Stella’s gastrointestinal tract seems to be in good working order and she possesses a talent for farting on command. How many little girls will come and sit on your lap just so she can rip ass, say, “Smell that” and leave? I know one!

I am thankful that ramen noodles are so cheap. The kids insist on having them for lunch and then only eat a few bites. Unless Maizie is on a bender, then that girl can put away three bags easily.